Random Traffic Through Nick's Brain

Some things that are true.

• Good friends are hard to find.
• You can only be a new dancer at any level once.
• You should enjoy learning something new and unexpected in square dancing.

Have a new gmail account. I’m going to be testing the reliability of it’s spam filter by using it for online / web / forum / Usenet postings.

The address is deleted-for-privacy@gmail.com. Feel free to use it to contact me, though the response time SLA is lower than my existing primary address.

Dear 2nd Grade Teacher,

I was just 7 years old, of course. It was early in the year, and I got a bit bored in class. I wasn’t disruptive. I didn’t say a word.

I decided to complete my math homework… for the whole year. The next day, you noticed what I’d done. You decided to berate me in front of the whole class, and then forced me to erase all the work I’d done. Not because it was wrong or anything, just because I didn’t do things on your timeframe. I protested lightly, but you’d have nothing of it.

Now that I’m older, I’d just like to say thank you for the experience… it was very formative.

Go fuck yourself.

Ahhh… I feel slightly better now.

Part of my cousin’s email forces me to keep life in perspective. She’s serving in Kabul.

The thought of being surveyed, monitored, or attacked kept me awake. We did
not have air conditioning in the vehicle, but we cannot open the windows or
unlock the doors, as this leaves the opportunity for grenades to be tossed
in. I looked down on myself with my loaded pistol in the holster and my C-8
mini-machine gun across my lap, ready to draw.

Was in the car a couple of weeks ago with some dancers discussing creepy old men interested in pretty young female dancers.

Nick: Thankfully, there aren’t any creepy old women at Tech.

C: Well, there’s woman.

Nick: Really?

C: Yeah. She gives some of the men the creeps. She tends to like them with dark, shoulder length hair.

Nick: Thinks: Hmmm… thankfully, I have no/short hair.

9 days later, the lightbulb goes on. “Hey! My hair is about that length. And dark. And woman ran her fingers across my back at Lake Shore without me giving her either verbal or kinesthetic permission to do so. Aha! C was trying to warn me. ”

Ain’t I just slow?

Had a dream Friday night while in Montreal at the in-laws’ place.

It all started as Dina and I were discussing our upcoming vacation. I was dismayed to learn that it would be a city-hopping jaunt through Europe. I was just too tired from work to do that. I wanted something more relaxing. A cruise perhaps.

We wanted to use our computer to change the vacation, but Jim and Smooth were taking it apart for some unknown reason. They had the machine in pieces. Any part that could detach from any other part was. The inability to get online, plus their torpid pace was starting to aggravate me.

Then Smooth decided he wanted to dust the motherboard. He looked around, and couldn’t find the can of compressed air. So, instead he grabs the fire extinguisher. I tell him not to play with it, but he ignores me. He starts using the fire extinguisher to ‘dust’ the computer parts, and is getting yellow powder everywhere.

At that point, I yell Smooth!

Except I actually yelled that. Everyone in the house heard it. It scared Dina awake. It actually woke me up… it’s 3 days later and I’m still peeved at Smooth for using the fire extinguisher…

Woohoo! I sight-called this evening. Near completely sucked at it, but it was a start. Doing something that scares me was fun.

Had a decent day at work. The portion of the upgrade I’m working on ran from start to finish. Had some good conversations, both real and virtual. On the real side, I’m starting to recognize social and political dynamics in meetings. Now if I only knew how to fix them… On the virtual side, I’m realizing that I actually like some people, despite my normal disclaimers of not liking them. The invitation to my 2nd Annual 30th Birthday Party next month is rapidly and rabidly spiraling out of control. I quite like it that way <grin /> . Y’all are invited of course. Email me and I’ll send you a link… I just don’t want to have the page spidered.

Somehow, on the drive home, a lot of things came together in my mind. I’ve been feeling for a little while that it’s time to get off my ass… I think it all came together on the drive home… I don’t quite know why… and I don’t quite know what it will translate to in practice… but it’s somehow time for a change…

Got home and had another good virtual exchange. Apparently, my handling of a situation which I thought mostly affected me, had repercussions on others. I was slightly peeved at myself for it, but, I’m happy it’s come to light. In my own defense, I’m not used to being in that situation… I’m blaming it on the Sampson effect.

Time to go and have a good summer. <grin />

...
You wear sandals in the snow
And a smile that won't wash away
...
Give us a tantrum
And a know it all grin
Just when we need one
...

One of my favourite .sigs ever is:

Where am I?

What am I doing in this handbasket?

Why are my feet warm?

I’m working on a new one… unfortunately, I’m not that adept with words… so it’s still not that good… suggestions appreciated.

What happened?

Why is my hand bleeding?

What's that food doing on the floor?

I’m wondering if the food part should be alluded to using the five-second rule…

I suspected that it was the case when I used to keep my hair short. I’m pretty much sure of it now: my hairline is receding, quite quickly in fact. This more than anything suggests to me that it’s time for a <snip /> .

I’ve come to realize that there is a sizable contingent of people that have never seen me with short hair.

Been delving my way deeper into a new social circle. Been finding out that the group-perception of me, if there is such a thing, is a) fragmented, and b) not at all in line with what I thought it would be.

The fragmented part is interesting. I know that a group dynamic is made up of individuals interacting, I just need to remember that the parts do not need to look like the sum of the parts. This is akin to the lesson I keep having to remember, I’m only seeing the surface of people. They have an underlying, ever-changing depth that combines to make up what I perceive.

The fact that parts of the group perception are wildly out of sync with what I feel I am probably goes back to the surface vs. depth thing. They see the surface, which apparently, looks quite different to them from the outside than it does to me from the inside.

I’m not quite sure what to do about the differential. I have it on good authority that I shouldn’t do anything. I’m not quite sure that doing nothing is something I can do…