A few final notes from doing customer care some weeks ago.
First, when I got into work this morning (grumpy, after changing a flat tire in the rain),
I found a gift certificate for a night on the town for a decent sum from the company.
That, plus 2 weeks perspective, make me feel much better about things.
So… in the three stories that follow, I was able to resist doing the first two things, but not the last one.
One customer is a real bitch. Accuses me of lying to her. All around difficult. I asked her to confirm her name.
Customer Brenda Smith
Nick Bites tongue and doesn’t say: Brenda, that’s ‘b’ as in bitch…
I try to explain to the next customer that we’re having an intermittent manufacturing issue, and that some items didn’t come out correctly. To ensure a quality product, I tell her that she should tweak a specific aspect of her product, and we’ll send it to manufacturing again. She doesn’t quite get the meaning of intermittent. She tells me that things either work or they don’t. Intermittent is bullshit. I finally convince her to do the tweaks. Then it’s time to give her an order confirmation number.
Nick Your order number is 12345-
Customer OK…
Nick 67890
Customer Could you repeat that?
Nick 67890
Customer OK…
Nick Bites tongue and doesn’t say: No such thing as intermittent, dumbass?
One last customer is unhappy. Her order didn’t get there a second time. I’m under instructions not to interrupt the customer and let them vent. But I’ve let this one vent a fair bit. When she pauses for a few seconds, I try to interject:
Nick Let me see what I can do for…
Customer I don’t want to hear what you can do for me. I don’t care what you can do for me. I want my money back.
Nick OK ma’am. That sounds fair. What I was going to suggest was to refund you your money and send you a free product that you’d ordered. But what you said sounds much fairer. We’ll just refund you your money.
Customer Sputters. Small voice. A free product sounds nice…
Nick Ignores last sentence and starts refund process.